I’ve been reading too many stories lately about people being called in to see the doctor and when they get there he’s got no idea what the appointment is for, has the wrong notes which he hasn’t read anyway, and makes wholly inappropriate assumptions or rude and thoughtless comments. Why do such people join the medical profession in the first place? Not for the money, surely?
Now, why have you made an appointment?
‘You asked me if I would come in!’
And why did we ask you to do that?
'I can’t think what the reason might have been!'
Well, let’s have a look at your records…
I see that you’ve had a few tests.
That must be why we want to see you -
To decide what to do for the best!
This test says you’ve just become pregnant!
That’s odd for an eighty year old!
I must say that you’re looking well though,
It’s the hormones that do that, I’m told!
Ah! This test says you’re diabetic!
I’m guessing you must be Type 2,
For Type 1s, it has been my experience,
Are much slimmer and younger than you!
What’s that, you’ve been Type 1 for decades?
You’re not pregnant because you are male?
Well then, please would you go, for I’m busy you know,
And I don’t have the time for your tales!